What do you believe?

Cereal is a morning staple in my household. I prefer the granola and muesli varieties and have been inspired by a company that puts their heart on the box.

Dorset Cereals says "We believe that life really is too short to settle for second best and that simple, honest pleasures are often the most rewarding."

It's a bit odd that a cereal came to mind when I read the first chapter in the book The Art of Convening but that's how my mind works.

I love the clarity of their core or driving belief. It's the answer to why they exist. They have built their brand on the idea of simple pleasures.

The first chapter of Art of Convening, ‘At the heart of the matter’, focuses on getting in touch with your deepest and most powerful self.  To be clear, the book is about how to have authentic engagements, meetings, conversations etc.

I’ve been trying it out with my wife and at work and it works well.

To be ready to convene with others in an authentic and enriching way we must first be aware of not only who we are but also who we are in relation to the people we are convening with. This starts with identifying our core beliefs or values just as Dorset has.

One of the exercises in chapter 1 that helps to deepen self-awareness focuses on identifying your non-negotiable values. One way to ask this question is ‘What do you stand for?’ Another way is ‘What do you stand up for? What are you willing to fight for?

I’ve found it difficult to answer questions about values head on. I’ve found it easier to think about experiences in which I’ve been in conflict or upset or frustrated with someone. The reason there is conflict is because there is a clash of beliefs and a lack of understanding or empathy for the other person(s). This exercise seems to energize my brain and awaken my deepest beliefs.

Do this:

To get to your core values or beliefs imagine a situation that really got you upset or kept you up at night and think about what belief you were holding onto that triggered an emotional reaction. What was it that the other person said or did? Why did that get you upset? What is it you believe in so strongly that it got you worked up?

For me a core belief, a non-negotiable value is R.E.S.P.E.C.T!

When others belittle or dismiss others as being lesser than they are my heart pounds faster and I get angry. And I want to run and hide. Heck, I’m not saying I’m great at dealing with conflict, that’s for another time, but I can use the conflict scenario to tap into what I deeply value.

So what?

Reconnecting to our core values and beliefs reminds us about our true character and what we bring to the people we convene with. I carry respect with me and have always found that as a result of this people are open and trust me which bodes well for my role as a researcher. 

After writing this I’m hungry for a bowl of cereal. I hope you enjoyed chewing on this blog post. Do the exercise and post your comments.